How To Choose The Right Partner By Not Choosing

Garrick See

If you are like me, then you’re probably thinking about your love life a lot more than you should be. Regardless if you’re a guy or girl, we all suffer from I’m-Going-To-Die-Alone phobia, which I assure you is not the worst thing that could happen to you.

All of us have been brainwashed into thinking that there is “The One” out there for all of us and, if we don’t find him/her, then we are doomed to walk this earth unaccompanied. I’ve been in that situation countless times, and I still get little jolts of it every now and then. It’s definitely difficult to brush away those feelings of loneliness and insecurity when you’re surrounded by people who, to put it in another term, have found their lucky penny.

I’m sure you’ve seen couples roaming around campus and just mellowing in their own little romance while you’re sitting alone with your lunch and just hoping that those feelings would go away by staring into your phone or laptop. Well, I am here today to tell you that it’s not going to get easier, but instead it will be more adaptable according to your current situation revolving around everything you’re involved in.

A recent discussion that I looked at talked about the falseness of “true soul mates” and how, by giving in to the idea, it will even greatly dampen your chances of finding someone. We often put too much emphasis and importance on finding someone perfect due to all the music, movies and books we connect with. The “you complete me” phenomenon is a very dangerous game to play because we know that nobody out there can ever succumb to the perfect being of our other half in our minds.

So what are we supposed to do then? I hate to be the guy to say it, but in this age of competitiveness, the very best that you can do is to put yourself out there and show what you really are in all its earnestness. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not, and just be genuine so that other people can see that. Also, as humans we tend to want to impress other people, but that is not the most important thing; it is the ability to shed some light on other people for a change instead of yourself.

Here’s a challenge for you: instead of trying to make yourself look good and presentable in front of people, why not reverse the situation and help to make someone else look good for a change? Compliment them, help them out with an assignment or even say something nice about them to other people. You’d be amazed at how a person will react to that despite being in the worst of times. Once you’ve done that, everything will roll into place. The greatest challenge in this world is not to see who comes out on top as the strongest, but who can still be humble in spite of defeat.